Unsolicited Submission - Deleted (The Trailer)

Every day an aspiring writer sends me an Unsolicited Submission, and sadly most of them are bad.  Recently I received one so horribly written, I have decided to start making the worst into trailers.

That said, this was the email I received:

ALEX is diagnosed with a strange allergy since he was six years old. Whenever someone he cares for leaves him, he’ll get a rash, and sure enough, everybody he cares for leaves him. Misguided by his alcoholic grandfather, MURPHY, Alex believes he’s allergic to love and other people. In order to de-rash himself, he reprograms his world with only imaginary friends, good and evil.

When Murphy finally wakes up from his hangover, a decade has gone by. He blames vodka for turning his grandson into a loner and gets an idea that’s even more alcoholic: hiring three roommates to keep Alex company before he moves to heaven in a room with no view.  Life suddenly spins with fun, maybe too much fun, especially when Alex realizes he’s incurably falling for JOJO, the quirky girl who gave herself a love vaccine when she was eleven years old. But instead of fighting the unwanted love, they decide to nib it in the bud creatively: over-do it, and get over it, hopefully, with no pain.

My latest screenplay, DELETED, is a whimsical romantic comedy celebrating a hero’s journey of running away from love, yet along the way, he finds courage, freedom, sneakers and ultimately, the true meaning of love and what it is to be human.

 And now, my trailer for DELETED...

Unsolicited Submissions

I am a writer, but also am a producer.  Being a producer means many things, and while most of them are constantly working in an attempt to get a film greenlit, as an independent filmmaker, I must also make some sort of name for myself as a writer and as a producer. 

As a producer, I'm listed on IMDB and for a few bucks a month, you can sign up for their subscription service and get all my work details (office address, phone number, and email address).  While this is great since with a name like Christopher Smith, it's that much harder to actually make a name for myself, it does make me that much easier to find by everyone.

Every aspiring and struggling writer, like I said, for a few bucks, can get my contact info.  For the most part, I don't mind.  I was, and in many aspects of the word, still am a struggling writer.  I write and then I must get my words out there in the eyes of other readers.  For other writers, under my producer's hat, I am those eyes you are attempting to have read your material. 

I read all my emails and will admit, occasionally I receive a logline or synopsis that sounds fantastic and I want to read it.  In which case, I do make myself available, even if you never hear from me.  Other times what a writer sends just isn't my area of interest or is it something I don't think I can do anything with, for at least in that moment.  But then there's the rest of the emails I receive. 

Here is my bit of advice, something that was pounded into my head from every writing mentor I had.  If you are going to write a script, book, or whatever and you pour months and perhaps even years of your life into that material, do not, I repeat, do not write your cover letter in haste.  I get so many letters from writers that do not even proof their cover letter, that I am embarrassed for them.  A summary or logline is supposed to tell me in as little words as possible why I should not just want but need to read your script.  However, the loglines I receive, are so poorly written, on too many occasions, I cannot understand what your story is about.  If that's the case, and even if your screenplay is brilliant, you have failed as a writer.

I strongly believe that any story, no matter how outlandish, no matter how crazy, can be a great story, it just needs to be written well.  If you cannot piece together a couple paragraphs, then, to me (and to most other producers) your idea will be tossed and your email will be deleted.